Recently I've met the most creepy person I've ever met in my life. My list of creeps is short. When I lived in Europe, I was encountering creepy men everywhere. In college I just met jerks, but they were not creepy; they were just jerks. Now, I think that in "the real world" I have met a real creep. It's enlightening. Combining the sleaziness of being my superior and the annoyance of my own dependence upon his company, he not only has taken the cake, but he has baked the cake, hollowed it out, and is waiting inside of it to pop out at the most inappropriate time possible.
Mainly as a reaction to not having men hit on me in high school, there were creeps around every corner in Europe. I wore my high school ring on my left ring finger and turned it around so it looked like a wedding band every time I road the trains. In Amsterdam walking around the city one night another tourist came up and propositioned me for sex. This was definitely creepy, but I just got pissed off and swore at him. Seriously, 50 euros? I'm way better than that.
During college, all the guys that were creepy got warned and told to stop. They stopped. This was made easier by the fact that they were all below me.
Now I find myself face-to-face with someone I can't fake being married with or swear at or just dismiss because he's my boss. He hired me under false pretenses, he makes inappropriate suggestions, and is overly familiar in his written and verbal communication with me. In the states, I'd claim sexual harassment and get his behavior changed faster than a NASCAR oil change. Unfortunately, I can't do that because I need his company (meaning an institution, not a social relationship) for my visa.
What if you had to deal with a creep for a limited time? I've been brainstorming and have come up with the following stratagem: Suck it up a few more weeks, get my contract translated, figure out how much notice I need to give him before I quit, get my visa, quit.
So after these six years of meeting creeps, will my newest approach take care of the creeps? Pretending to be someone else works if they don't know who you are. Swearing works for creeps who I don't need to have a relationship with. Explaining to a guy why he's creeping you out only works when you both know you're better than them. Before the 1964 Civil Rights Act what did women do in situations like this?
4 comments:
Try shaming him in front of other co-workers.
Or call his bluff?
Can I assume you are still in Japan?
The guy is Japanese or European?
If I was a woman I would ask him if he would like to repeat his comments in front of your co-workers so that you can make sure you understand his intentions.
But I don't need the visa...
I don't know the specifics of how he's being inappropriate but I can imagine. You could just try asking him not to address you in that manner. Try asking other female staff there if he creeps them out too. If he continues there might be someone in personnel who you could talk to. They do have rules laws and regulations to combat sexual harassment. Trouble is there are way too many oyajis around who haven't updated their way of thinking regarding women in the workplace ever. Now run along and make me some tea
50 EUROS?! I AM OUTRAGED! I'D PAY AT LEAST 100!
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